So Sunday marked the last day of what I call “MCIA week”. For a whole week straight, I saw MCIA every single day, from Sunday to Sunday. Last Sunday was our performance for the APhiO Dance Competition (congrats UCI’s Rho Rho Chapter!). Monday was the Zeta Class hang out day in which my newbie class and I spent the entire together exploring the botanical gardens at the Huntington Library, which lead to our last practice of the year on Tuesday night, and our last performance of the school year at Care-A-Thon on Wednesday night. Thursday was a glutinous team banquet at Steelhead Brewery which we were introduced to our new cabinet for the 2009-2010 team. (If you wanted to know, the coords are Jenevieve Manguiat, Rommel Rosales, and Roxy Shih, and the captains are Summer Hart-Poindexter, Jason Tong, and Stacey Rivera). Friday marked the beginning of our retreat which brought us out to Cathedral City, far out in past Palm Desert. Then on Sunday, after what seemed like a very short drive back from Cathedral City and a stop to $10 ALL YOU CAN EAT KOREAN BBQ with seriously the best car ever, I ended my MCIA week on such a huge MCIA high.
I am not going to lie, throughout this year, MCIA seemed to be just a side dish I would enjoy with my main meal of what I call College. Work, School, and SPOP were on my main entrée plate, and I thought MCIA would be a nice side dish to have with my meal. I thought it would be something fun to do on the side and that would help take up some time. And a couple days before retreat, I doubted how much “fun” this retreat would be with the 40 of us in one house, in the desert, for three days….and it being dry (I know, I sound like an alcoholic, but it’s a normal thought right?)
As I spend this day as the first day I wouldn’t have to officially see any of my teammates (although it was pretty much a full table at a student center table during lunch today), I gave me time to really reflect on what I have experienced this year, especially at retreat.
Coming out of this weekend, I can honestly say that retreat was something I had totally not expected. It was so much more. There are two main components that I was able to gain two big concepts: realization and appreciation. Being in such an environment such as retreat, it helped me really reconsider what MCIA really meant to me. Before I go into my realizations and appreciation concepts, I would like just point out my top 3 memorable events to me (in no particular order)
1. MCIA “Spring Break!!!” Pool Party – it was just plain old good fun waking up after sleeping at 5:30 AM to have mostly everyone in their bathing suits at 11 AM hanging out the pool. The music was bumping, some were just enjoying the shade while others were basking in the warm desert sun. Some boys were grilling up some hamburgers and hot dogs (inside) while others were shooting up some memorable photographs. It was just good to see us all hanging out enjoying each other’s company, which I thought we didn’t get much opportunity to so outside of practice
2. My words to Rommel Rosales – I have known Rommel since my freshmen year of high school and we have been able to maintain our friendship till now. However, there was one thing that I hadn’t told Rommel and after finally being able to tell him, brought out a whole other side to me and made me appreciate him more as a friend.
3. Watching the Roots performance – While this year, we didn’t get to experience a live Roots (MCIA alumni team) performance, watching the video as a newbie the morning we left was such a cool experience. Just to know where we came from and how far we’ve come was a great experience.
As I enter my portion on the realizations and appreciations I have made through this weekend, just know that not all will be mentioned here. I want to keep some to myself but share some to others in which I didn’t get to during retreat.
After this weekend, I have realized how much impact this team has made on me and how important it is to me. I feel that MCIA is moved from the side dish plate to my main entrée plate. Although dance was fun, family and fun was what I really gained from being on this team. It was an experience that is irreplaceable and something I don’t regret. I learned to appreciate the people on my team and what they have brought to the team individually.
I also realized my role on this team and it was brought to my attention by my fellow teammates. For this whole year, I have struggled being on a DANCE team, with learning choreo, auditioning, and performance. I often questioned myself with the question of “How was I ever put on this team and how am I still on it?” After having my talks to for my teammates, I realized what role I played on this team and I appreciate all the words that were given to me and all the moral support they have given me though out the year.
I realized how amazing my newbie class is. One of my pals, Czareine, said during retreat “Congratulations Zetas, none of you guys left this year” and I was just kind of surprised by this statement. I thought about it and saw how true it was. All 11 of are still here from beginning to end and I couldn’t be more proud. I have realized how cohesive my class is. It seems like we are all thinking on the same wave length and we honestly have each other’s support in every way. As the oldest of the Zetas, I was dubbed the name “Papa Zeta” and I decided that I wanted to take that role seriously. I wanted to take care of my class as a whole and to make sure that we one family within a larger family. I like to now think of our newbie class as a puzzle. We are all look different with our different shapes, but when you put us all together we all fit together so well to make a larger picture. All of us form some part of that puzzle and without one of us, it would look incomplete. The day we all hung out at the Huntington Library was one of my favorite days on the team because instead of looking at our class as 11 individual newbies, I saw as an “Army of Skankz”. I appreciate every single one of you and what you have done for me. I have said this before, but although I am the oldest of the newbies, I have looked up to every single one of you not only as amazing dancers, but strong people. I have learned so much from you guys and I am so proud of you. (Newbies, check the facebook feed in the future)
I also realized that our team has its problems and is not perfect, and how it can be a good thing. Our team is relatively new, with its sixth year being in existence and our team is in its process of growing exponentially. As a result of our growth, changes are made every year and that’s often when our struggles come. To some, changes are harder to accept than others and some resist change as much as possible. However, I also realize that change is necessary and inevitable. Change is necessary to bring a growing team to its greatness and is inevitable as a growing team. Besides the problems within the team, I realized that there are also flaws in people. People are not perfect, and thank goodness for that. That means, that we as people, like a new dance team, can change over time. We just need to allow ourselves to change and grow. I really appreciate every person I got to interact and learn about during this trip. I have learned from the flaws of people and know that there is a probably a reason for their flaw. While I’m not exactly accepting their flaws, I am willing to see the potential of change in them and how they can bring it upon themselves, and be able to fix their own flaws if they allow it to happen. Although I am a only a newbie, I have learned so much from such problems and how to be a good returner next year on the team.
I have realized to truly appreciate you. You have taught me how to really care for someone else besides me and like gravity, you have pulled me back down to earth. You know how I feel and that’s all I really have to share here.
I wish that were able to do AGTs for MCIA. I realized how much I appreciate everyone on the team, and I feel like I am able to better express myself through writing and be able to write everyone I said as time wouldn’t have allotted me to say everything I wanted to, to every person. I appreciate my teammates.
I also realized the validity of the concept that “Everything happens for a reason” and it is a concept that I have truly believed in for a while, especially when I got rejected from my #1 college (so cliché, I know). Its pretty much self explanatory, and it also helped me pull through times when things don’t always get exactly how I want it to or planned it to. There is a reason:
- why I made the team I when did
- why I was in GBB
- why I struggled so much with auditions and pieces this year
- I rode up in the car with Jen Chung, Chua, Kevin, and Big
- For everything.
I appreciate everything that life has brought me and where it has led me today.
There are more, but those are for myself. If you have read all of this thus far, I really appreciate for having the patience and endurance to read through all this.
I hope I seemed coherent through this whole blog because it just seemed like I was rambling on typing away while I’m in class watching a movie that is a satire on how Asian Americans are perceived in the United States. How that relates, but I thought I would throw it in here.
I would like to enter MCIA Eta year with hope. Hope for change. Hope for growth. Hope for new experiences. Hope for new friends and building on old ones. Hope for new skills. Hope for being a great returner (fingers crossed). Hope for my goals. Hope for more fun. Hope for MCIA.
Thank you Jenevieve Manguiat and Patrick Villar for this opportunity. I hope I have made you proud.
