My A-Z Happy Book

So while talking to a friend on a cold night, the topic of hot showers came about. We were talking about how cold we were and how much a nice hot shower would feel. He told me that if he had a happy book, that Hot Showers would be in it. Then I said, if I had a happy book, then garlic would be in it. That is when the idea came to my head...wouldn't it be interesting if i made an A-Z Book of what makes me happy? This is only made possible because I am on winter break right now and this is what helps keeping me busy besides work and the book I am reading....hope you enjoy and maybe get you inspired to make your very own.

Apples....growing up, apple based desserts have always been something that i seem to drawn to. Whether it be apple pie, apple crisp, caramel apple, or apple filling and pie crust with cold stone ice cream, the taste of cinnamon and apples has always brought me comfort. I would usually always prefer and apple dessert over any chocolate one.

Biology...Okay, forgive my moment of nerdiness. This is actually a recent discovery I had made and I hate to say this now but it was a "little too late" discovery for me with me three years into college already. Ironically, I thought I pretty much hated biology up until about a year ago. My sophomore year biology teacher in high school was such a douche that it made me really hate biology. I applied as a chemistry major because my first chemistry teacher in high school made it so interesting. Little did I know when i took my first biology class in college is when i discovered how much I like biology so much more than chemistry. Mostly, I enjoyed physiology and how everything worked together to make sense. One of my guilty pleasures is finding really cool biology animations on youtube and learning from those.

Cleaning...the thing about cleaning is that it's not the act of cleaning that makes me happy, it is the result of cleaning that makes me happy and keeps me motivated to keep cleaning. I like to see a difference in things and noticing the difference is what makes me happy. Like seeing a messy room suddenly have so much more floor space, or go from dirty carpet and being able to see the lines after your vacuum, cleaning and seeing the difference gives me a great sense of accomplishment and plus its always nicer to live and work in a cleaner space.

Disneyland. Honestly, everyone should have this in their happy book. I don't think I ever fully appreciated what this place could be until I bought my first annual pass. during February of my first year. Given the first fact that amongst the stress of college, it was a good escape to go to bring you back to your childhood and bring out the inner child in you. It was nice that it was only a fifteen minute drive and if you felt like you had a really bad day or were just looking for a fun place to go with your friends, you could rely on your Disneyland pass (given you weren't blocked out). I think the moment I truly discovered what Disneyland really meant to me and the true reason why Disneyland is in my happy book occurs for a couple weeks during the holiday season when Disneyland transforms into something truly magical. Just looking at the lit up castle, the huge Christmas tree, decorated main street, and watching the most amazing fireworks show really brings me to an entire new place where it just washes away all my worries and stresses.

E....:) Just Kidding. well...kind of. haha

Friends and Family... nothing makes me more happy than the people I choose to surround myself with. Theres nothing more I can say, but I feel like i have been able to associate myself with some of the best people ever.

Garlic - Everything just taste better with garlic don't you think? Well, not everything, but garlic does taste good with a lot of things. I like to even eat cooked garlic by itself. I used to hate the smell of garlic on my fingers after I had cut them up, but I've grown to appreciate that smell now. Yum...garlic!

Hot showers - I think this is the inspiration behind me starting this A to Z Happy Book. It's especially relevant during these cold times when nothing feels better than a nice hot shower when you are freezing your ass off.

Ipod... I've had my Ipod for about two and half years now and although the battery life isn't too long now , it's still serves as great company for me. It's those short moments where I'm walking from class to class, or I am waiting by myself for something, or I'm driving my lonely self in my car that it's there for me to keep me company with my favorite songs playing. It makes that walk, wait, or drive that much better.

Jon and Kate plus eight. This is probably my greatest guilty pleasure on television. When there is a Jon and Kate marathon on TLC, I can be glued to that television the entire day. I don't know what is so fascinating about that show, but i seriously can not get enough of it. It's probably the fact that I'm so intrigued of how that family functions with so many kids or that those kids are the cutest things that has ever existed. Whichever it is, I'm stuck. It's amazing how the two of them can run a household in such order with 8 kids running around recklessly. Omazing.

Korean Food - Nothing can warm up my body up quite like Korean Food; its like my soul food. Whether it be scarfing down all you can eat Korean BBQ or eating Kim Chi Ji Gae and Soontobu on a cold day, Korean food has the ability to always make me feel better. Plus it taste pretty bomb dot com.

Laundry...this is probably my favorite chore to do. I like several aspects of laundry, from the aspects of getting my clothes cleaned, taking out warm laundry from the dryer to refilling my shelves and closet with my clothes.

Mean Girls ...as much as we all had to admit, this is definitely the movie of our generation. I think it really describes our generation in a very satirical, but truthful way. I think the majority of us can relate to it because either we were those characters on the show or we knew people that were characters on that show, plus they are just some classic lines in that movie that I use all the time in my daily life. "GOD KAREN, YOU'RE SO STUPID!"

Noodles - I've always had a thing for nooodly-typed foods. Whether it be friend noodles, chow fun, pho, ramen, or udon, its my choice of carbs over rice.

Omelettes - one of my favorite breakfast foods of all time. I really miss the omelettes from commons that i would always go eat on the weekends at brunch with my hall mates. Those were the morning after meals after a night of drinking where we would share our drunken stories. But in general, an omelette is a great comfort food for me

Pals- My Pals in MCIA are really the best and I didn't really get the whole idea of Pals and how exactly I would fit in with my Pals, but after hanging out and spending time with my Pals, I think i was truly placed in the right pal line and couldn't have asked for a better group. We as pals have our crazy "Good But Bad" fun, but when it comes down to it, I can depend on them to be there when i need them, even if its just someone that can listen to me.

Quiet - amongst my crazy and busy life, when i get a moment to have peace and quiet away from it all, nothing feels better.

Rain Driving - Despite the fact that rain usually brings on the cold and wetness, there is one aspect of the rain that really soothes me and calms me. I've always enjoyed driving in the rain, except on the freeway, that just scares me. I find it kind of therapeutic the sound the rain makes when it hits your car and how my windshield wipers wipes off the water. It goes back to that whole cleaning thing where I feel like my windshield wipers are wiping clean the water off my windshield.

SPOP. This was the most obvious one for me. This is probably the biggest thing on this list that makes me happiest. Ever since I started college, my life has been pretty much revolved around the world of SPOP. I fell in love with UCI because of my experience as a spopper, then I became a spop staffer for the next two summers. There is no way i could describe the experiences I went through going from a spopper to a staffer and ultimately, a returner this past summer that would amount to what this program has meant to me and what it has done for me the past couple of years. I have had so many memories, made some of the most amazing friends, learned so much from my experiences with the program. I have been so lucky to be a part of this program thus far and i will cherish everything i have gained from SPOP.

Texts - there usually nothing that gets me a more simple happiness than having a conversation over texting. its just unfortunate that i don't have unlimited texting.

UCI - Going into college, UCI wasn't one of my first choices. I was the typical story of wanting to go to UCLA or Berkeley but only got into UCI. Plus, my brother was already going to UCI so I knew I would be living in the shadow of my brother when i first entered UCI. Little did I know how much I would fall in love with UCI and everything that UCI has offered me thus far. I know now that this was the college for me and that i couldn't imagine myself anywhere else.

VEGAS....pool parties...Fat Tuesdays....bomb buffets...the Strip...steak and eggs...just wait till I turn 21. haha.

Wicked...for the longest time, I have heard stories of how amazing the musical, Wicked was. I was never a huge musical fan so i was skeptical when i went to go watch it. When i finally went to go watch it this past year, the musical had lived up to my expectations and so much more. It truly is as amazing as everyone says it is and i am so happy that i got the chance to see it before it left LA. Although, I am so down to watch it again.

Xmas Season.. I think if it weren't for this holiday, I would hate the winter season all together. I hate the cold and the winter season is all about being cold. However with Christmas, it brings along lights, trees, gift exchanges, Christmas at Disneyland, but most importantly this season is all about giving and cherishing your time with your loved ones.

Yucaipa, California...that places makes me happy because it has to do with something that I have been involved with for a very long time. It is where the Red Cross Leadership Development Center camp is held every summer and something I have been a part of since 2002. It's just a program that has always held a special place in my heart that can never be replaced. Although I did take a break from the camp this past summer, LDC has always been something that has made me happy and the people I have been able to meet through it has been people who have been the most supportive in my life.

Zyrtec...well I've actually never tried Zyrtec but I know it would make me happy if i ever did need to take it. My allergies are bad. Wait, thats an understatement; my allergies are the biggest bitch in the world. While most of the world gets annoyed and sneeze and gets runny knows, my sinus clogs everything and my body complete shuts down. If you catch me on a day when my allergies get to me, you will see me at the lowest of my lows and probably at one of my most miserable moments ever. That is why taking any medication that can help relieve my systems would probably make the the happiest person and since I think my body is immune to Claritin so i will take zyrtec now. My boss told me it works better.

alive, healthy and happy.

So it's so very interesting how i stress about losing the little things. I rip my hair out when I lose my car keys only to find it in the place that was right in front of my face. I have a panic attack when I can't find my wallet only to have it be in the passenger seat of my car. At the moment, it seemed like the end of the world when you lose those kind of things. But after watching the news recently, it almost forces me to take a step back and think, what if you lost everything and you couldn't get it back.

I was watching the news on the current wildfires that are taking over several parts of Southern California and watching houses being completely burnt up left me completely helpless. They were real homes with real families that lived in them. They had memories and belongings that were literally being burnt out. I tried to imagine how it would be, how i would feel, what i would do if that situation happen to me and it's scary thinking that it's more of a reality than not. Having one of the forest fires in back terrain of Irvine, and hearing how some of my friend's family had to be evacuated from their homes during the current fires is so frightening.

I think the best thing i could do now is pray for the families that are being affected by these fires, doing my part for the fires by conserving water and electricity, and lastly be thankful for what i have.

To be thankful that I'm in such a prestigious university that allows me to get an amazing education and to not take advantage of that.

To be thankful for a reliable car that i have that takes me from point A to point B

To be able to live in such a nice apartment to live in Irvine and to have a home back in Long Beach that will be there when i go back.

To be thankful to have a rewarding job that allows me to help the school and prospective students and supplies me with sufficient monetary funds to spend so i dont have to stress my mom out for spending money

To be thankful to be part of an amazing dance team that always give me constant support not matter how flustered, frustrated, tired, cranky i may be.

To be thankful to be surrounded with amazing friends from all aspects of my life that continue to lift me up whenever i need it.

To be thankful in having a supporting family that i know if all else failed, they would still be there for me.

and lastly, to be thankful to be alive, healthy, and happy.

late night thoughts...

its 4am. i can't sleep. its probably cause i have so many things running across my mind.

i hope i'm not putting myself in the same trap i put myself into a year ago. i learned and I grew, but even the Great Wall has cracks.

anyways. this is a big week for me. we'll see how things go for me. all i can hope for is the best. and whatever happens, happens. everything happens for a reason.

i should probably update this more often.

random. really.

So, taking a freshmen bio class, it really makes me feel old and overwhelmed. However, they aren't that bad when brought down to a smaller context. Working in a group of 4 during discussion, it was warming to see their energy and eager to learn. It was more than just their drive to learn bio, but to also learn about college. While engaging in the questions that the TA gave to us, I gave some insight on college and my experiences. This small little instance really reminded me of staffing where those freshmen are so eager to take in what you have to say and really gain more knowledge about school. It was quite refreshing actually. On the plus side, they did help me finish my bio worksheet. It's really a win, win situation. Hopefully their drive, will help me maintain my drive.

I've vented about a certain something to specific individuals about something (i know, confusing) that isn't necessarily a problem, but more a change that i needed. I feel that I'm starting to embrace that change and that change is doing me well. For those who I've talked to about it, just know that its going good. Progress. A step in the right direction.

Lastly, to top off this random post. You know you have those individuals who whenever you see, will always brighten a part of you and make it so you can't help but smile and feel happy? I am so thankful for those people. You may not know who you are, but just thank you for being you because that is why I smile everytime i see you.

Take me on a trip, i want to go somewhere.

This morning i was having a talk with one of my SPOPPERs, Victor Tu, that strayed from our usual talk about how he's so excited about college or some piece of advice that I am giving to him about college. Instead, we talked about traveling and experiencing different culture around the world. We talked about how interesting it was to learn about different cultures and the fact that theyre are millions of other people living a completely different life from us. We both wanted to do a lot more traveling and get to experience different perspectives.

Then I went to lunch with one of my friends from Teal year who just recently came back from doing EAP in Japan for about six months. We had a good talk about her experiences in Japan and how life there is so much different than life here. Even something as simple as going out and grabbing something to eat to going out for a night of fun is so significantly different. Just listening to her talk about her experience really got me really want to study abroad sometime in my college career. I was contemplating different places that i would love to go: Japan, Korea, Hong Kong, and i think i would like to go to Hong Kong. My dad told me to not choose Hong Kong if i did decide to study abroad because it would be too "safe" since i understood the language already and my family would be there. The biggest reason why i would love to go Hong Kong to study abroad is because i really wanted to reconnect with my culture and try to relearn some of the language that i lost over the years. I have become so Americanized that i couldn't even get by with my family anymore. I would just awkwardly nod or shake my head to answer a yes or no question. Besides that, having my family there would help just in case anything happened or if i wanted to be spoiled.

But other than studying abroad, i really wanted to just travel a lot and go to different countries to just really experience life in different shoes. Sort of like that show, Exiled, minus being the spoiled brat who has everything, to be completely taken out of your environment that you aren't used to. I think its just a really good learning experience because you are just so wrapped up in your bubble and i think one would be able to gain a lot of knowledge.

lets go somewhere.

When life gives me lemons...

I want to squeeze the juice in some bitch's eyes. Just kidding. I make lemonade! With the SPOP alumni party over, it truly felt like Gold Year was pretty much over for me. It was time to truly take for myself until school starts.. We weren't all going to necessarily hang out together all the time and we kind of go back into our own lives, but its good time to spend that quality time with the ones you care about to just enjoy each other's company. The other night, someone asked me if there was anything bothering me in life. I had to stop and think about it for a second. I couldn't pin point out something that was really bothering me or a major problem in my life. Of course, there was the minor annoyances like having to pick up my car the next day, but overall, everything in my life seemed set. SPOP is over, staffing was done, and so were all the spop parties. It was now time to really enjoy the company of others, my lemonade.

Going off that, last night, i went to get coffee with takeshita and regina to catch up. I know that's totally Laguna Beach status and you can totally make fun of me for it, but it was good quality time together. We just sat for five hours sipping on some overpriced caffeinated coffee, talking about our lives and just the everyday gossip. It was really good spending time with them.

Welcome week is around the corner and that means im going to be seeing a lot more people, including the incoming freshmen. Not to sound like an old creeper, but i can't wait to see them on campus and moving into their dorms. Talking to my spoppers, they seem so pumped and excited and i remember that feeling of being so excited and counting down the days till i moved in. ill be an upperclassman this time around, so definitely feeling the end coming soon. Plus, i can't wait to be swiped in at brandywine and pippens.

So, back to the making lemonade out of the lemons of life...

What are your natural highs? What makes you happy and gives you the warm and fuzzies?
My big ones are: taking the laundry out of the dryer even tho its a chore.., finding money in my pocket when you are broke off your ass and definitely the feeling of taking a good shit because you have been holding it in forever...

what are yours?

Summer Nights.

After getting a surprise visit from the evil twins, Emily and Sonia and causing a great delay in my departure, I finally was on my way to Long Beach. It's been such a long while since I've been there and i thought it would be refreshing to spend some time away from Irvine. I also needed to wash my car, so i figured ill do it at home home.

My dad takes my brother and i out to Guppies, which i haven't been in forever. Its so much bigger than i remember. I ordered a kimchi fried rice which i barely ate any of because of the after effects of a pretty treacherous night. I was definitely not being M.I.P.

My dad then took me to a Korean market to buy some groceries. He was telling me different things he does at his place to cook and was giving me tips on how to cook at home. So i bought some duppoki (rice cakes), some kimchi udon noodles, edamame, and mandoo (dumplings). Im excited to eat Korean food at home. and damn, that bag of rice will last me a long time.

After getting my car cleaned up, scraping the bird shit off and getting it shiny again, i made my way back to Orange County. I pretty much ended the night hoping around place to place hanging out with whoever was down to kick it. It's nights like these that i enjoy most. Where there is nothing better than enjoying the company that surrounds you, even if you are frantically writing up AGTs. When you surround yourself with amazing people, you will have an amazing time, no matter what. You know when you are around the best people when the little things turn into adventures. Heres to the home stretch of Summer 2008.

All Good Things Must Come to an End

It has come, the end of staffing for Gold Year. I never knew this moment would come so fast. How is it that i had already staffed 5 different halls. Each and ever hall has its on unique mark on my heart and each are very different from one another...

SPOP 1: Power Rangers: Lost in OTEROdise
Thus comes T.F.O., the first one. The night before my first spop, I was filled with all kinds of emotions. I was so excited to start my staffing experience during Gold Year, yet so anxious and nervous at the same time. Although I was a returner, the format and set up of this year SPOP was new to me and I am not quite sure how I would approach the unfamiliar. However, i had confidence that i would find some way to cope with the new changes. I guess I was just the most nervous about the impact I would make on the kids. I wanted it to be more than just "orientation" for them, but rather an experience. How could i possibly do that in just two days, and not even that. I woke up that morning pretty damn tired, literally having to DRAG myself out of bed. I arrived at school ON TIME (haha) that morning still groggy. It wasn't until I saw the groups of "yellow shirt people" slowly approaching Puente that my energy started to pick up. All my worries and concern somehow just magically floated away seeing my support system report for the morning staff meeting. I knew if i had any problems or worries, i could really on these amazing people to help me out. The first day went by like a blur. There was a lot of moments where i had to think on the spot or try to work out the solution, but somehow, it worked. My next mission were those SPOPPERS..my first ever gold year spoppers. I dove head in, when i sat next to a few of them during lunch. I rememberely them clearly, they were Neal and Christina. We had good conversation during lunch and i was excited to meet the rest of them during their Mesa Court check in. I don't think i could explain the rest. It turned out to be an amazing first SPOP that although, had its glitches in the beginning, everything else started to figure themselves out. First talent show was amazing, the dance was a fun first trial, and i went home that day so satisfied and pumped for my future SPOPs.

Oterodise Staff:
L-R: Sam Renzi, Ashley Browne, Sly Edrial, Me, Jennylyn Estrella, CP Anne Chua and Ken Tran


SPOP 3: The Poop Stars of poo-poo-POOENTE

A day before i would staff my second spop, i get an email from the coords. That email came to be a shock to me. Of course I know in the course of being a returner, I would CP eventually, but to have a concrete announcement telling me that i was going to be a CP for the very first time scared the shit of me. I mean, the returners never received a "CP for dummies" manual and the only familiarity i had with CPs is my experience with my CP Alan and CP Lauren from teal year. I really didnt know much about the responsibilities of being a CP, but i did know i had to go out and get some CP gifts. Nonetheless, being a CP for a hall wasn't as bad i thought it was. Of course there were times that i was stressed out, but i think it was due to me psyching myself out and putting more stress on myself more than i should of. My biggest concern as a CP was worrying about my staff and making sure they were fine as well as the spoppers. I think i did more worrying than i had to because my staff did mroe than a fine job taking care of the spoppers. Because of them, i didnt need to have a mental freak out and i want to thank them for that. OH SPOP 3 was also the birth of the first hall romance of SPOP 2008. The love between Poo Poo Pooente and SOULtero Train. I love you Wes. You are an amazing CP and an amazing friend to talk to.

Poo Poo Pooente Staff:
Top (L-R): Jeff Fong, Sarah Bana, Regina Gayatinea
Bottom (L-R): Angie Bordador, Esther Chong


SPOP 5: CamiNOTORIOUS B.I.G.s "Blinging in Gold"

This particular SPOP is special to me because it was the "firsts" of many I had during a SPOP this year. It was the first time i truly got to experience a full CHA experience. My Cha trip was cut short the first couple times because i had to tend to the halls. I also got to go an official full SPOP DANCE experience. I consider the first dance our "guinea pig" and trial one and i stayed behind during SPOP 3 as CP (plus i was dead tired). Finally, i was it was the first time during gold year that i was able to play SPolympics. I had such a blast and they made staying up till 4:30 so worth it!

CAMINOtorious B.I.G. Staff:

L-R: Sam Soon, Diana Huynh, Leslie Akizuki, Ashley Browne, Melody Cruz and Monkey C.P. Kristle in the tree


SPOP 6: Party in Pradodise - Where my Prado people at?
When i first got my list of my staff for SPOP 6, i nearly fell to my knees. I had such an all star staff and i was more pumped than ever to get back to staffing even if i had just done SPOP 5. I had no doubt my staff would do an amazing job, and after staffing they more than made me proud. Just watching them staff, i constantly had a smile on my face. They seriously made my job as CP as easy it could possibly be because they knew what they had to do and they seriously handled. More importantly, what made this hall so special for me were the SPOPPERS. These SPOPPERs were seriously down for anything and were always pumped and excited. You could totally tell by their hall cheers because, not being biased or anything, we were the loudest hall at SPOP 6. You could hear it from anywhere "O O, YOU WISH YOU WERE IN PRADO" I had such an amazing time staffing SPOP 6 and it made me so pumped for my T.L.O.

Party in Pradodise Staff:

L-R: Steph Takeshita, Jesus Martinez, my kiddo John Kim, Diana Thai, Theresa Hsaio, Charlotte Simpliciano


SPOP 8: Bahyatt Beaches Resort


So this is it. My LAST ONE. MY LAST HALL I WOULD EVER SPOP. I didnt come into my last spop in the greatest of moods. I had a really bad day the day before SPOP 8 and i also got sick, so i wasn't really excited coming into SPOP 8. I just hoped that i would get over my sickness so i would have the energy to give my TLO my all. However, it was 2:45 pm and i was dirty, sweaty and still sick with the spoppers checking in to Mesa Court within 15 minutes. I quickly took a shower so at least on the outside, i looked fine. Slowly, the kids started trickling in and there was this magical force that just came in. When more and more people came and we moved outside for a round of dance off and and woosh, i felt a transformation. Suddendly, i felt like i had no sickness at all and i was so happy to rock the rest of spop. My ended my staff experience with one of the most amazing halls, with the most amazing staffers and the most amazing spoppers.

Bahyatt Beaches Resort Staff


L-R: Cat Pham, Paulo Aquino, Cory Ishihara-Wing, Eric Kim and Stephanie Chhun



It's pretty funny how the Olympics are going exactly the same time as SPOP this year. Just as hard as the athletes are working for their gold medals, i felt like i worked just as hard to earn a gold medal in SPOP, and after closing, i feel like i have achieved the gold medal that i wanted. I came into this year with a goal. As a returner, i would give my all into the program and give not only the spoppers, but the newbie staff all that i could offer. I put my 200% into this program and it has paid off. The results were wort all that extra responsibility, effort, hard work, drama frustrations. I would like to congratulate the first year staff on their part in SPOP. You guys have truly impacted the incoming freshmen and accomplished your purpose. To the returners, theres nothing more than i can say to you guys than that i love you and am so blessed to be in the same group of returners as you guys. There is one thing i realized this morning and this goes out to all the SPoppas. I feel like we are such a strong group and i feel like we are a band of brothers. Our comraderie is something i felt and i am so honored to be dads along with you guys.

Thank you gold year for all that you have given me. SPOP is more than orientation program, its a way of life.

When you reach for the stars...

Sometimes you miss and land in the clouds but other times, you just fall straight back to Earth.

Lesson Learned

Here are some things i learned from CPing SPOP 3 and going to SPOP NOR CAL

• I have the greatest support system with SPOP -- as "chill" as the job as CP may have seemed, i find myself being stressed at certain points of the day because i felt like i had nothing to do, but had so much to do at the same time. There were so many worries and concerns that i had, i just kind took the job as it came and kind of went with the flow and took care . if you know the type of person that i am, i like to at least have some sort of set schedule and have it written down for me. Of course, we had our CP folder, but it still didn't seem defined for me. It was something i was not familiar with and trying to think about all the things i needed to do or tell the kids really stressed me out. Luckily, i had an amazing group of staffers to help me through the process. Thank you to angie b, regina, sarah, and esther chong for being such an amazing group of staffers. I would really like to give a special thank you for jeff fong. i really can't thank you or express how much i appreciate how you have helped me. I know it may seem like you didnt do much, but to me, you kept me sane. I knew i could turn to you for anything but that i really didnt have to ask you for anything, because i knew you already knew what to do and you did it so well. And it wasn't just my staffers in my hall, it was basically all the golden shirts that were at SPOP 3. I knew i could turn to you guys no matter what with my worries and concerns and i could lean on you guys for support. Wes, you really are amazing. You are an amazing person to talk to and im glad we made the first ever SPOP HALL ROMANCE. i love wes. =]
• The REAL purpose of why i staff SPOP: being CP, i really realized even more the main reason why i do this program. i remember that i kept telling myself..."you're doing it with for the spoppers, you are doing it for the spoppers,". I kept telling myself that because i felt like all the sweat and effort i put into this progam didn't go into effect. Most of my worries as CP came from whether these kids will be excited for UCI, let alone, even have fun. i guess, after writing this, it wasnt the duties of CP that stressed me out, it was the spoppers that stressed me out. Believe it or not, it was making sure they were okay that stressed me out the most. After touch game, when the kids said, "I had a really good time and am excited for UCI because we had the best staffers," it was then i was able to let out a big sigh of relief and told myself "nick, you did your job, and you did it well, congrats".
• embracing connections you have with people...I really enjoy having my personal times with people. I would take those times over any crazy parties any time. i really love to genuinely talk to people and getting to know them and learning about their life. I especially go to do that after going to NOR CAL with spop heads. having a special connection with that someone that makes your friendship unique from other friendships and something only you and that other person can share. Even something as simple as making eye contact and feeling that connection you have with that other person makes it so special.
• taking time for yourself...sometimes you really need to step out of the loop and take the time to have to yourself and reflect. its important to realize that you don't always need to be in the circle and that there are times where you do need to step back. its that whole step up and step down thing. in order to help others, you truly need to help yourself first. you need that time to yourself to re-boost and re-energize and focus on your ultimate purpose not only in the current situation, but as well as in your own life.
• realizing your self worth..its so true when people say that you are your own worst critique. i don't give myself credit sometimes. its hard for me to see it because i really don't give myself enough credit, but yeah. I should realize my self-worth.

"the truth is, we put up walls not to block people out, but to see who cares enough to break it down"

sitting in my room.

im here sitting in my room, early in the morning, getting ready to go to work, except theres 1,000 thoughts running through my head. im just thinking about all the stuff that i have to take care of as well as all the changes that i have gone through the past couple of months. I know, weird combination, but it happens when you wake up earlier than you thought. I'm thinking about the changes that I've seen in myself, as well as my relationship with others. it's been for the good, i can say, but it's also been a roller coaster ride. i honestly really don't know what I'm talking about right now, i just felt like i needed to get something out on a blog.

i guess i'm talking about one relationship. despite the fact that we have grown closer in the past couple of months, i feel like theres still this wall between us. i really dont know what it is, and i really don't know how to fix it, but theres something there that is preventing us from getting closer. I mean, i'm happy with the relationship that we have now. we have moments and we also have our talks, but i still feel like theres something blocking us from getting even closer. we'll just see how time goes and maybe something will help or maybe i should just be content with what we have already. whatever, im getting cheese fries.


on a side note: i really miss disneyland. im hoping being blocked out for a month and half and then being able to come back on August 17th will make my comeback more magical than ever. until then, turkey legs, Fantasmic, fireworks, and the Toy Story ride will just have to wait.

The First One

I can't even begin to describe my feelings and experiences from staffing SPOP 1. Although I'm a returner, staffing the first one seemed like a totally different experience. There were definetly a lot of last minute changes and "go with the flow" moments, but regardless, T.F.O. was truly amazing and I couldn't have asked for anything more.

To the staffers in my hall - My CP Anne, Sam Renzi, Jennylyn, Ken Tran, Ashley Browne, and Sly. You guys were truly an amazing group to work with and all of our personalities mixed so well and we complimented each other. Anne, you were an amazing CP. I hoped i was able to help you out and relieve any additional stress, and to the other first year staffers, i am so proud to watch you wear that gold shirt with pride and connect so well with those kids. My heart will forever belong to and remember Power Rangers: Lost in OTEROdise.
To the other staffers: YOU GUYS WERE AMAZING. you guys really make me proud and just watching you guys staff just brings me pure happiness. Despite all the changes that occurred with in the program and all the fears that i had regarding if these changes would be able to accomplish what the SPOP mission is: mission accomplished. We've impacted those kids and made them excited for not only going to college, but going to UC Irvine. It's pride that we already have and now we have passed it down to future generations. Just imagine, when they are applying to be staffers, its going to be YOU that they inspired them to be staffers. Congratulations and get ready for future SPOPS

To the spoppers: there ARE NO words to describe how much i care about you guys. thank you guys for making my first GOLD YEAR staff experience just truly magical. thank YOU guys for everything.



To the coords: Thank you for your amazing commitment and hard word. You have an amazing staff because we have amazing coords.


so pumped for spop 3. =] SPOP 2: YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO KILL IT!


[p.s. this blog is dedicated to jason kim. thanks for your words of encouragement. you inspire me. i shall write about supermarkets now!]

I really want to come kick it with you...

After the madness of doing the showcase for SPOP MODERN for a crazy crowd and having a entertaining dinner with some SPOPheads, what a better way to end the night then to kickback with a bowl of hookah and chill. Just conversing with Jeff Fong, Sunil, Jason Kim, Shahirah, and Reg at J.Kim's place is a way to get ready for madness that is SPOP 1. We are all talking about blogging and how it's a good way to not only write down our thoughts, but also a couple years from now, be able to reflect about what we were thinking about during our college years.

I got Regina and Shahirah to potentially start one. Yay. Reading other blogs seems so intimidating. They get really deep into their thoughts and it seems like they think some crazy thoughts. I don't know if i ever think that way, but hopefully by reading the other blogs, I'll get inspired. Until then, I'll just try my best.

But anyways, besides the crazy parties, Vegas trip, Arrowhead, trainings in SPOP, as well the SPOPs themselves, the one thing that i look forward to is these "kick back" moments, where you really don't do much with others except kick back, enjoy each other's company as well as good conversation. It's a nice break from all the madness that can encompass SPOP. I'm going to try to have more of these. You down?

babyfaced

I think it's some evil plot of KIIS FM or something because seriously, every time I step into my damn car, the song, Damaged, always plays. The song is pretty catchy, but not when you hear it everytime you start the ignition.

Anyways, I celebrated Jamie Arcinas, aka Nuni's, 23rd birthday at Banana Bay. Oops, sorry to call you out! Happy Birthday This is when its pretty lonely being within arms reach of that age of 21. Being behind the row of 21+ year olds ordering 2 for 1 Martinis and Red Devils makes these 11 months seem so much longer. Its okay tho, they let me sip on the Red Devil and they are the most fun people. woo hoo! But being with that crowd gives me something to look forward too. Something fun that i hope to grow up to be in a couple years with my fellow youngins. cheers to that, being a babyface.

self sufficency

i did it for myself and im proud
=]

and now i feel great!
i didnt cave.

revitalizing body, mind, and soul. one step at a time.

It's Raining GOLD

-artist: Paulo Aquino

This is basically what an expansion of what i had said during Weekend Training for Gold Year:

Ever since I have gotten involved with SPOP my freshmen year, I feel like I have become one of the luckiest persons. My brother (Purple Year) had always encouraged me to apply for staff,, even as a freshman, but warned me that it's hard to get it as a first year. I applied just to give it a shot. I guess it was kind of good that i was having a pretty slow and sad day because when I got that acceptance letter in my mailbox, my mood changed a complete 180 degrees. I can't believe i got the position of SPOP staffer as a freshman.

Staffing Teal Year was such an amazing exposure to college life. Getting perspectives from all aspects of college and being able to experience it all, as well as influencing incoming freshmen. I definetly got to staff with some amazing people and was blessed with such a loving family. DFW BLUE!

I knew i had to reapply as a returner because i knew that my journey on this SPOP trail wasn't completed quite yet. I applied as a returner, knowing again that it would be difficult to get the position. I was still young and the idea that i would be a "dad" let alone be considered a "returner" seemed very daunting. But behold, i received that roller coaster email yet again couldn't believe how lucky i was to be given this opportunity again.

Walking into the first returners training, i was so happy with what i saw. Knowing who was a returner felt so different than actually being there with all the returners. I felt such a strong chemistry between of all us and i felt so lucky being in a group of such amazing returners. At the end of that first training, when we were trying to find our partners for our discussion, i was just looking around going...where is my wifey!? Shahirah? nahhh... Sarah Khan...HELL NO....and it was getting towards the end and i still couldn't find my wifey. Then out of no where...Issac Cheung caught my eye and we looked at each other. He hadn't found his, and I hadn't found mine yet, and I knew we were both thinking, "No way...NO FREAKING WAY...", so we approached each other, and our HEARTS MATCHED!! OMG MR. and MR. CHEUNG!!! Ya'll can have your wifeys, but i had got myself a hubby.

So with being so lucky with staffing Teal year, being with such great returners and getting me a hubby, i anxiously anticipated waited for my family. Our family was the last discussion of the week and the anticipation kept building the whole week. That morning was a wreck with classes, work, and getting family stuff together, i was a hot trany mess, but i have truly been blessed with such a loving family with 4 daughters and 3 sons. Daddy's Little Angles <3 10 weeks of training went by and i got to slowly, but surely meet all the staffers. They truly are an amazing group. I couldn't ask for a better group of staffers to staff with. I definetly got lucky with this group. Winter Quarter was tough, and although Spring Quarter was fun and busy, it defiently was tough. I go by a quote that i have lived by for a while, "After every storm, the sun will eventually shine". Our color revealing this year couldn't have been a more appropriate fit. Reading the marquee with everyone and having our color revealed with our shirts being tossed down at us...the sun was definetly was shinning with our GOLDEN shirts. It seemed so PERFECT.

SPOP is just inexplainable. It's something you have to experience in order to understand it, and it stays with you forever. Now, its only the beginning of Gold Year. The summer is just starting and I can't wait for how brightly that Gold Year can shine this year.

First Blog

Xanga is getting old.
Time to start something new.
Will Post soon.
Please read
=]